I’m the wrong man for the job, I am. This compromising thing is not as easy it seems. Especially for an ‘art’, the art of compromise. I mean, I’m good at art. I got an A* at GCSE level in secondary school. Mr. Collard said my work was some of the best he had ever seen. I said ‘surely I am the best you have ever seen?’ he said ‘no, not really, ok, I’d say you’re in the top 3’. In contrast to me, Mr. Collard was quite the compromiser.
I like to think my lack of compromise comes from some sort of deep artistic integrity where true original artwork is the poster child for the art of uncompromising. In all likelihood it is probably just a deep seated stubbornness for not wanting to be proved wrong. Thankfully I can stubbornly admit that I am stubborn, because on this occasion I am right.
What I am going to do now though, is take full responsibility for my stubbornness and then responsibly pass that on to someone else. You see, its not my fault. It is Frank Sinatra’s. He sang ‘I Did It My Way’, which ushers images of determination, individuality, dreams, achievement and originality. When I do it my way, I’m labeled stubborn, uncompromising and difficult. Theres no winning. I trusted you Frank.
OK, so what have I been stubborn about today? Well, its very similar to artistic integrity and striving for dreams regardless of what others think. I had a hole in my jumper and my girlfriend suggested I should change it because friends are visiting, but I refused – repeatedly, on the grounds I am 28 and can dress myself.
Whilst the last part of that paragraph is true, it is, in all fairness, missing an adverb; terribly. The jumper* was short, faded and had a big hole under the armpit. In a gallant defence I managed to link my jumper wearing to all manner of things, such as; the over consumption crisis that is beginning to affect the human race, the pressures that are put on young minds to conform to what is ‘in’ fashion and that being on the lucky side of the human inequality lottery dictates I should not treat clothing with such disrespect as to take it off or throw it away – some people don’t even have clothes.
It takes me approximately 4 seconds* to remove a jumper. The deep sociological debates about the fabric* of humanity lasted approximately 1 hour. Which you will note is far longer than the jumper removal, even adding in 2 minutes to find a replacement and put it on, would only stretch that to 2 minutes and 4 seconds, far less than the debate option. A compromiser would have had a bonus 57 minutes and 56 seconds over me, and think of all the things you can do in that time. I mean, you could probably debate the worlds sociological problems in that time. Not with me obviously, I already know the answers, and they won’t be changed.
*ah sorry, a jumper, for my American readers is a cow that has wool stuck to it and jumps over a fence, hence; jumper.
*Not my record.
P.S The reason for all the jumper rebuttals was because I’ve been reading a book called ‘End Game’ by… a person. It is about all the various scientific scenarios the world could end. Cheery.
Read more, its good for you.