In the west, we love to hijack other cultures, religions and traditions whilst simultaneously electing people who want to suppress other cultures, religions and traditions coming to ‘our’ particular country. One such belief we love to inherit as our own is the theory of Karma, a Buddhist belief that if you perform good deeds with positive intentions the universe will reward you with positive behaviour towards you in the future. Whilst it is a wonderful idea, and great motivation to be nice to people the system, in practice, operates slightly inefficiently.
This week marks the one year anniversary of this blog. One whole year of blogging (just ignore the 6 months or so when I didn’t really blog). I starting writing on the blog to share my feelings and try to widen the discussion around mental health, I even released a book (how marvellous). These are great intentions and I think positive ones too, and that is why the universe rewarded me in the last few weeks with the failure of the handbrake on my car, which meant it then rolled down a hill, flipped over and landed in a bush. Karma.
Whilst it is easy to say Karma doesn’t exist in this instant, I prefer to imagine Karma as a high Fixed-Rate Savings Account. I accumulate all this Karma, which I am not allowed to access for a certain number of years, but in return for this restricted access, I gain Karma interest on top of the already banked Karma. Unfortunately, I didn’t read the small print so I now have to wait 347 years for the Karma to pay out.
It has been a great year though blogging-wise. Across all platforms the blog is available it hit just under 10,000 subscribers, with monthly hits between 20,000-25,000 at its peak. Although I never did the blog for these reasons it is nice to know people enjoyed reading the content and were engaging. Over the last 6 months, however, things have changed.
Since moving to Ireland at the end of the summer I have felt less creative and ultimately began neglecting the blog. I have bursts of creativity every now and then but not enough to sustain a successful blog. If I compare my mental state to a year ago I also seem to be at a net loss. I’ve definitely lost a lot of my optimism, confidence and self-esteem in that time. I suppose it should be no surprise as depression has been known to rob people of those things on a regular basis.
One of my bursts of creativity did result in a sister blog though, which you can see over at www.genuinecasio.com. This new blog was inspired by my frustrations searching for jobs. Over and over again I would come across nonsense job opportunities which almost wholly benefit the employer, with little upshot for the employee. So I decided it was time to call out the bullshit and re-write their job ‘opportunities’. Feel free to head over a check out the few posts I’ve made already (I recommend checking it out on a desktop). As with this blog though, I’m not fully committed right now meaning posts will be sporadic.
I’ve tried many things to improve my physical and mental health in the last year and I seem to be failing on both fronts. I don’t want to give in or give up but I definitely lack the determination required to head back into battle once more – at least for now.
I just want to thank everyone who has been following the blog over the last year, it has been great talking to so many people and listening to other peoples opinions and stories. I really hope to continue the blog in the future, although for now, it is up on the shelf like an overused toy. I guess I just need to wait a while before it becomes interesting or fun again. Or maybe my Karma account with cash out early and we can all have a digital disco. Either way, I hope you are all well and Happy New Year.